Have I told you I have the attention span of a gnat on crack? If so, I’m just reminding you to give you a good idea of where I’m at right now.
I’m also going to make myself a cyber-promise to never-ever-and-I-mean-NEVER – have a deadline that is anywhere near the month of May – of ANY year.
Bear with me here. As my amazing editor, Victoria Oldham does when she knows I’m going through my tortured process…
My “nice” voice in my head – tells me everything is fine. Maybe it’s the positive affirmations that I train myself with – the advice of good friends, my wife, Sandy (who really IS an angel), and people who love me take the time to tell me everything is going to be okay.
“You can DO this!” They say….
Representing the Angel who sits on my right shoulder, if you will.
However, the challenge is – my shoulders look kinda like this:
“Ha-ha-ha!” She laughs dramatically. “Just who the hell do you think you’re fooling? Fraud. You’re NOTHING like these people you’re trying to fit in with. You are going to disappoint ALL your readers who are waiting for this finale.”
How many of us can pull the EXACT memory clip (with images and voice) of this movie quote from memory?
Believe-you-me, once you listen to that bitch? Even for just a second – her voice gets nastier, louder, and more insistent. She sucks you right into a time vortex.
One day you’re in April – everything is dandy, and you’re flying along – then you turn around, it’s May, and your third computer in four years has crashed.
I read an interesting article about brain meltdown in the Scientific American a while ago – and when I looked for it to share with you this is what I could pull. Unfortunately, if you want to read the whole article – it costs – but the gist of what I’m talking about is here. Authors, Amy Arnsten, Carolyn M. Mazure and Rajita Sinha state:
“…The relentless pressure causes reasoning abilities to slow and even shut down entirely. The experience—known variously as choking, brain freeze, nerves, jitters, folding, blanking out, the yips or a dozen other descriptive terms—is all too familiar to virtually anyone who has flubbed a speech, bumped up against writer’s block or struggled through a lengthy exam….”
When I am IN this state – I’m in denial of an important fact: I created this with my expectations.
I forget that I’m a magnet and I draw every one of these situations to me by Universal Law of Attraction.
I have been studying this for years now.
I can and will do better.
I have to change my language, thoughts, and behaviors.
Sounds simple right?
Everything takes practice. And I have many years behind me of “creating challenges.”
Ooh look! I just changed my words!
I can do this!
*Cue Angel harp music.
So, I’m working now – and any encouragement and positive energy you can spare on my fb page – would be greatly appreciated.
I appreciate all of you that stopped by to read this and I encourage you to look at your thoughts and see what you’re creating for yourself today!