Three Writing Wishes

Bedazzled

Have you ever seen the movie Bedazzled with Brendan Fraser and Elizabeth Hurley? (I mean, helloooo! Elizabeth Hurley as the Devil? Who can pass up that wet dream, huh?)

(Author fans self.)

Anyway! Beyond the obviously prurient hormonal reasons for watching said flick, there’s the additional draw of being granted wishes from a power on high. (Or “down low” in this case.)

Who here hasn’t daydreamed about being given everything they’ve ever wanted?

When I was a kid, I’d go through the Sears catalog with a pen and circle all the cool clothes, drool over the latest toys and choose the furniture for my future house.

(That must have made my mother’s chore of shopping for Christmas a heck of a lot easier!)

Three Wishes

Since I don’t need to sell my soul to catch the girl of my dreams (I’ve had her by my side for twenty-seven years,) I thought I’d narrow down the daydreaming a bit.

Instead close your eyes and imagine with me a moment. The Writing Genie has appeared in your living room in a puff of sparkly purple smoke.

Is he male with the physique of a surfer or body builder? A female with green skin and dark hair? Does your Writing Genie have the voice of an angel or does he/she sound like he’s/she’s been drinking rotgut whiskey and smoking cigars for the last three centuries?

Your Writing Genie has given all of us three wishes. How will you choose to use them?

Wish #1

I’d wish for the perfect office!

Currently I write at the dining room table or at coffee shops. (Usually the latter on a deadline.)

Even if I had a room I could dedicate to an office space, I don’t know that I’d use it however. It would be nice to have all my books and files in one place, the most awesome computer system and the freedom to decorate as I’d like.

(Did somebody say an oil triptych of Voyager flying through space bracketed by Janeway and Seven of Nine? No? Oh, sorry…my bad.)

The problem is that I actually need the visual distraction to access my inner muse. I do my best writing at a coffee shop, staring out the window at people and cars passing by. Therefore a home office just won’t do.

So, my perfect office would  be away from home, a business rental with a large window at street level. I’d have all the awesome computer, books, file cabinets, etc., and watch the funny people as I write!

(And the triytych too, of course!)

Wish #2

My second wish would be for money in the bank.

I know, I know…that’s not exactly a writing wish, is it?  But it would be so sweet to quit my day job so I can spend more time writing!

With money in the bank I could afford rent and utilities, food and travel expenses. (Not to mention the business office rental!) Then, rather than leave the house five days a week for the day job, I’d head to my office and spent four or five hours writing.

(Blissful sigh.)

Wish #3

Hermione Granger’s Time-Turner. (Hey! This is my fantasy, remember!)

What I wouldn’t give to have had that Time-Turner last year! O.M.G.

A year ago I had all sorts of plans for 2014.

I had three blog entries a month lined up and a guest blogging gig on a writing community site.

I finished the Slow Movin’ anthology and offered it up as a mailing list incentive.

Mailing list! I started a mailing list with the intention of at putting out at least two posts a month.

And I still wanted to write two books, four free short stories and play with writing flash fiction.

Needless to say, most of this fell apart by April or so. I spent the majority of last year struggling to finish one novel and keeping at least tentative touch with my fledgling mailing list folks and my regular blog readers.

Worst of all, only one book got completed in 2014…and it was two weeks late for its publisher deadline. Gulp!

It would have been quite a relief to have had Hermione’s Time-Turner, lemme tell ya!

(No worries this year, by the way. For more information on what I’m going to be up to, check my latest post—I’m Red Hott!!)

What About You?

What three writing wishes would you like to have? The sky’s the limit here! A computer system like one found on Star Trek? A personal valet/housekeeper/nanny to keep up on everything so you can focus on the writing? The finest and most expensive bottle of whiskey to celebrate the completion of your latest book?

And for the non-writers out there, what about you? If you had a genie grant three wishes, what would they be? Do tell!  There might be an awesome future story in your answers!


 

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12 thoughts on “Three Writing Wishes

  1. I was totally trying to describe Elizabeth Hurley to my wife the other day, and used Bedazzled as part of my description only I couldn’t remember the name of the film. She, of course, had no idea what in the world I was talking about. Thank you for mentioning it and making me feel not so crazy 😄

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    1. You’re most welcome, Abbey. Senility rears its head at the most awkward of times, doesn’t it? Talk about good timing on my part! Glad to have been able to help out!

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  2. Funny how the Bedazzled movie was based on the Faust character.
    The one who’s originally a scholar, unhappy with a successful, but not fulfilling life, so he makes a pact with the Devil, and ends up trading his soul for limitless knowledge and all sorts of worldly pleasures. Not so much a comedy in those terms.
    Or something to sing about, like ‘Damn Yankees’, the musical that’s also based on Faust, and features another Red-head, Gwen Verdon, as the Devil.
    The other side of that wishing coin. Be careful what we wish for. And what the trade actually covers, contract-wise. 😀
    I wonder sometimes what we’ writers would do if we were *really* granted three of our biggest dreams.
    Talk about plot fodder for the next book! Great premise, no?

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  3. My three wishes? 1) time to write (aka retirement), 2) a computer that doesn’t prefer to do it’s own thing, 3) enough money to take all the classes I want and to attend all the events I want. That would be heaven!

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    1. Elaine, you know it! If I could reach all the conferences and conventions I’ve wanted to do every year, it would do so much to keep me fired up for the writing. Good idea!

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  4. #1 for me would be money because, as you said, having money allows you to spend time writing and doing all the other things you want to do in life.

    #2 would be more self-confidence (hey, you said the sky’s the limit!). I don’t think that requires an explanation.

    #3 A machine that could take the thoughts in my head and type them out. Of course, it would only take “dictation” when I wanted it to–i.e., when I’m “writing” a story.

    Great post, Jordan.

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    1. RG, I did say the sky’s the limit. Good choices! I especially like your third wish. What I wouldn’t give some days to just think it out and have the thoughts translated to the computer…

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  5. 1. The patience to write the book I’ve always wanted to write.

    2. No more writer’s block. It’s just cruel.

    3. Get it right the first time. Edits are tedious. Wouldn’t that be fabulous? To write a final draft as your first draft? Yes, pure bliss right there.

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    1. Jove, love your contributions. Yes, it would be awesome to write a first draft an have it be the ONLY one! Maybe some day…

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