And they chose to live Happily Ever After… by Barbara Winkes (plus a FREE BOOK)

TheInterpretationofLoveandtheTruth_150dpi_eBook Congratulations to phoenixgrey85. She won an ebook copy of The Interpretation of Love and the Truth by Barbara Winkes!

Hello and happy Wednesday! My friend and fellow author Barbara Winkes is with us today. She has a new book out, The Interpretation of Love and the Truth. To celebrate, she’s giving away an ebook copy. To enter the drawing, simply leave a comment below. I’ll draw the winner this Friday, February 6.What an excellent Valentine’s present for someone, huh? And they chose to live Happily Ever After… by Barbara Winkes With Valentine’s Day around the corner, it’s a good time for this confession: I love happy endings, especially in lesbian fiction. There have been victories for marriage equality in several countries and states within a relatively short time, and those real life events reflect back on fiction, offer new storylines and possibilities. There are also warning voices, saying that we are focusing too much on marriage, that women are tricked by the idea of romantic love, and asking why can’t a single woman be happy? I believe choice makes all the difference: Marriage is a powerful archetype that, in my opinion, doesn’t belong to straight people alone, but to all humans. In real life, and in fiction. There are many other issues to tackle for our community, but every win in this one issue is meaningful, and it doesn’t mean that we forget all the others in favor married bliss. Yes, patriarchy has taunted and tricked women with its concept of love and romance, but it’s up to us to make ourselves aware, sort out what love means to us beyond patriarchy’s rigid ideas of gender roles. There’s a lot of good that will remain. I’m aware that many married LGBT couples have pragmatic issues on their mind as well, but without the binding emotion, why would we even care or stay together? In telling stories, we can pinpoint where we are now, a snapshot of the present. Contrary to the accusations from anti-gay groups and individuals, the goal was never to redefine marriage either, but to affirm a definition of marriage in which both partners are equal—no matter their gender. Straight allies, who are aware that no same-sex marriage in the world will have any impact on their relationship, usually reject the patriarchal definition as well. Wanting to be married is not the same as wanting to be straight, or “under the radar”. And of course single persons, LGBT or straight, can be happy. I just often feel that we have to catch up still: Straight women have been told they can’t be happy without a man—to see Angelina Jolie’s character in Taking Lives, or Sandra Bullock’s in Murder By Numbers without the obligatory male love interest, makes so much sense. However, lesbian, bi and transgender women have been told for a long time (and it continues today) that their love stories don’t matter, that they aren’t real. This might be only my opinion, but I’ll need a lot more HEAs, dramas and romantic comedies before I’m willing to give up one or two. It all comes back to choice, in determining your own life–and in having enough books to read. Happy Valentine’s Day and lots of love! There is enough for everyone.

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52 thoughts on “And they chose to live Happily Ever After… by Barbara Winkes (plus a FREE BOOK)

  1. Well said – great blog, Barbara! HEA comes in any number of definitions, and we should all be happy with our piece of it.

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  2. I’m all for happily ever after whether it is being single or partnered or blissfully married, we all deserve to be happy and it comes in all forms for all the forms of love and for all the types of people in the world..very well said!
    I’d be quite happy to win a free ebook..could read it to my wife on Valentine’s Day.

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  3. “Sometimes the best laid plans are not”… Intrigued. I love happy endings. Great blog! Lots of love from the lowlands

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  4. Being able to marry my partner would not only help my heart but have an impact on our finances. the the ability to pay only one health insurance policy would be so helpful. There are so many benefits that come from the ability to marry. Cost alone not to mention the legalities to protect my partner would give me peace of mind.

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    1. I believe when you make a commitment, you deserve to be able to make that choice, have the peace of mind and practical benefits that come from it. Hopefully after June, there’ll be no more bans on equal marriage. I understand that there are couples who won’t marry, but then that’s their decision. Having a choice matters above all else.

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  5. You are absolutely right, IMHO. Marriage is not for everyone; being single can be a wonderful life; and, there are many things to consider if you do decide to marry–these are applicable across the board, regardless of sexual orientation.
    I am a married lesbian. My wife and I have celebrated our 26th year of life together. Legal marriage was actually pushed by our attorney as a way to safeguard us on many legal fronts. Though we felt the solemnity of the wedding, vows we wrote, and the support of the judge who married us and our family and friends who attended, it did not essentially change our relationship. For all intents and purposes, we have been married 26 years. (almost 25 at the time of our legal marriage).
    Would love to be in the running for the free ebook.

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    1. Thanks for sharing your story, Aya! It’s true, people differ, their idea of happiness, and relationships. It all comes down to being able to make the choice. I’ve seen many couples get married after decades together for the reasons your describe, others choose not to. Ideally in a relationship, you have the love and the legal protections, whichever comes first. 🙂 But when marriage equality is a reality, it not only makes it easier for many committed couples, it also brings the conversation back to what matters most in a relationship (which is what, in my opinion, the anti-gay crowd is most afraid of).

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  6. We continue to fight the good fight here in Australia for marriage equality. Until everyone in the world has the right to marry who they want and the right to love who they want we must continue to tell the stories that matter. Thank you for reminding me of this through your blog.

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  7. I’d like to read your book, even as I am one of cynical people, seeing love as something very unreliable.

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