Performance Anxiety

I’m nervous.

Many of you have met me in person and if you have, you may also know that it freaks me out a little to get up in front of people, whether it’s to sit on a panel or do a reading. And now, tomorrow evening, I will be doing the mother of all LGBT readings: the Lambda Literary Finalists Reading at the Leslie-Lohman Museum of Gay and Lesbian Art in Soho in Manhattan. To say that I’m nervous is putting it mildly. I mean, I’m pretty good at putting certain things out of my mind. You know, I’m kind of like Scarlett O’Hara that way. I’ll put off thinking about stuff until tomorrow. There’s always tomorrow.Lambda-Medal-150x150

But tomorrow is almost here and I’m starting to feel the pangs of anxiety. I’ve sort of gotten used to stepping up in front of people at GCLS because I know a lot of you guys out there. But this crowd will be an entirely different animal. It will be mostly strangers, men and women. I’m sure there will be press there, and there will definitely be some damn good writers, who will most likely make me feel quite insecure (from their work, not their demeanor).

So, here I am, trying hard to not freak the hell out and just get up there and do my thing. With any luck, I won’t trip up the stairs (or down) and won’t stutter myself into a stupor.All-you-can-eat_v2_500x800

If you will be in the New York area on Friday, April 24, come to the reading. It’s free and should be a great night of stories and people watching. My cohort, Andi Marquette, will also be reading! Yes, that’s right. This is a big deal, so she’s flying out to join in the fun. We will both be reading from our stories in All You Can Eat: A Buffet of Lesbian Romance & Erotica. Here’s the full line-up of readers:

Timothy Liu
Michael Carroll
Ellen Bass
Dia Felix
Jameson Currier
R.G. Emanuelle
Andi Marquette
Craig L. Gidney
Michael Broder
Thomas McBee
David Swatling
Ron Suresha
Rafe Haze
Kelly Cogswell
Susan Kuklin
Sean Strub
Vinton McCabe
Bob Hofler
Heru khuti
Rob Smith
Shelly Oria
Dominic Ambrose
Sheela Lambert
Philip Gefter
Ann Herendeen
Stephen Morrison
Alexis De Veaux
Tim Federle

Event address:
Leslie-Lohman Museum of Gay and Lesbian Art
26 Wooster St. (near Grand St.)
New York City
Begins 6:30 p.m.

For more information on the event, go to the Lambda Literary web site HERE or Facebook page HERE.

I hope to see some of you there.



  1. You will be great! I do understand being nervous. I don’t enjoy speaking in crowds, but force myself to do so when the opportunity arises. I just hope the crowd can understand “nervous voice” when I speak.


  2. I just finished reading All You Can Eat a couple of days ago. Your contribution was excellent. The whole anthology is great and that is credit to you and Andi. Well done.
    As tough as public speaking in front of a room full of strangers can be, go in with the confidence that your story was one of the strongest in the anthology, certainly the most sensual and hottest of the bunch. You can do this!


  3. If I lived in New York, or anywhere east of the Mississippi really, I’d totally come heckle…’er…support you guys. You’ll be awesome. I have no doubt.


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