So I have embarked on my next Shay O’Hanlon Caper, Blood Money Murder. It’s the 5th in my series, and I’m ecstatically excited that I’ve hooked up with Bella Books. They will be releasing it sometime in 2016. Yup, that was a little blatant self promotion, but there’s a reason behind it. Just hang with me here. Yeah, we all know life is a series of evolutions. We start in one place and as we grow we change into something better (and yes, sometimes worse) than before. Or hopefully we at least a grow little smarter if nothing else.
Anyway, we evolve through our school years and we evolve after hitting that longed for age of 21, usually so we can drink legally. At least that’s often the case up here in the north. Maybe in the wake of the evolutions of life, while you’re partying and learning to be your own person, you stumble across a love of expressing the craziness in your mind on the page and you become an author. You might wind up with a publisher you think will be with you for the long haul, and a few years later you realize that’s not the case. On with the evolution, and you try a few things and don’t like them much. So You try something else. What seemed like suck city suddenly turns into something golden, and you know you’ve found a place that fits and is good and makes your heart lighter.
So that was a lot of blah blah blah, but I do have a point in here somewhere. Kind of. So. As we tumble through these evolutions and revolutions, we live here and we live there. Home is where we are when we are where we live. But sometimes home is more than that. It’s roots, and a place of belonging. It’s coming back to that same place where you grew up, and every emotion you ever had smacks you upside the head when you walk back in that particular door. It’s good and bad, happiness and sadness, love and ghosts of the past all wrapped in one big fat bow. It’s where a piece of your heart will always be no matter what. Evolution also means not just growing and changing, but letting go, too. It means looking back at the person you’ve become, and realizing that, throughout all of the ups and downs, the changes life brings, you’re okay and you will be okay.
Two days ago, I got a text saying that an offer finally came down on the place I’ve called home for the last 47 years. Yeah, maybe I haven’t lived there full time for a long time, maybe I begged my mom not to sell before she died. This is one of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with in my own personal evolution. And I know that in the long run, saying goodbye and letting go is going to be for the best. But it sucks. Regardless, I know that after I get past the emotion of it, I’ll be in a happier place. Kind of like my literary life has been…happy, sad, frustrated, and then happier than happy has been for a long time.
Yesterday, Betty and I went up to my family home, and loaded up the last of the stuff that’s coming back to our home. My grandma’s 1922 china closet and my great grandfather’s hand-carved 1905 dresser are two of the most important pieces of my previous life coming into the life we have now. It was a hell of a trip back, but I’m happy to report that the final stage of this next evolution made it a hundred miles safe and sound.
Hopefully now I can focus on my word count with a lighter heart. I’ll cherish the memories I have and I am incredibly relieved to let go of what’s weighed on my shoulders for a very long time. Future self, here I come!